What’s Love Got to Do With It?

In my last post, I discussed the importance of building community for career success. I’ve continued to think about this and to discuss it in my seminars on self-marketing and networking. So, I believe it’s worth spending just a bit more time on the immense value in building community.

Just about anyone working to improve their career or business success, knows networking is important. At its most pragmatic level, we know that growing a network creates access to information and to the connections of members of our network. And while we give a passing acknowledgement that “relationships matter,” many of us focus almost exclusively on making ever more connections to increase the span of our networks. 

Yet, too often, it’s the pursuit of opportunities that drives connection in the first place – e.g., sales people want qualified prospects and job seekers want job leads. In short, networking becomes transactional, leading to shallow connections lacking in heart. In reality, though, linking with people with whom you have only passing acquaintance, doesn’t often generate the kind of knowing, liking, and trusting that can lead to quality information and referrals. In fact, it often leads to frustration and circumvents the benefits that can come from deepening relationships.

So, what’s the remedy?

Well, if you get the idea that love has something to do with it, you’re right. But what is love in this context? Simply this: that you take the time to develop deeper and more caring relationships with the people in your network.

Traditionally, people have developed bonds via coffee, meals, and other shared activities. These are still important. Yet, we now have technology tools that enable us to add depth to our relationships by increasing our ambient awareness and supporting brief interactions over time – provided we follow basic off-line social niceties. You know, paying attention to the little things in folk's lives, like acknowledging their successes, sharing links to articles and photos, learning more about them both professionally and personally. And of course, communicating authentically about your own passions, interests and activities.

Over time, genuine sharing leads to genuine caring.

As you build more caring with more people, you develop a shared sense of community. Done well, you can build community with a diverse array of people. As well, and more pertinent to career and business success, you can create stronger bonds with people who are, or become, part of your professional or brand community.

Sure it takes effort, but there are clearly benefits. Not only do people in a community more freely share information and opportunities, but they also tend to thrive based on the very nature of the friendships they form. In short, love has every thing to do with it. In The End, it seems to me, The Beatles make the best argument for adding heart to your relationships: "And, in the end, the love you take/ Is equal to the love you make."

Cross-posted at Threshold Consulting Blog